There will be days when a nice walk is not possible due to the weather, but don’t let that get you down! Grab a chair for you and your older loved one, put on a little light music and have some fun with these chair exercises.

Stretching your muscles keeps your body working better. If your older loved one has trouble exercising, these easy-to-do motions will encourage them to move more often. The body just works better when it’s being used. Have your loved one try as many as they are able, but don’t push it. Be sure to drink plenty of fluids and enjoy the experience. Make it as fun as possible. If you can, sit across from one another and pretend you’re mimicking each other’s movements. Pick some music you both like and make it a daily routine! You’ll sleep better and have more energy for wonderful days ahead.

These are also great if you have to work from a computer for long periods of time!

1. Neck
In a seated position, straighten your back then extend your neck muscles and move them in a big circular motion.

2. Back/Stomach
In a seated position, raise both your arms; then while lowering and raising your chin, bend your chest backwards.

3. Shoulders
In a seated position, lightly bend your elbows and very smoothly rotate your shoulders.

4. Arms
In a seated position, loosen up your arms and hands; then shake, rotating from front to rear and side to side.
5. Chest
In a seated position, bend your back against the chair and expand your chest upwards, then straighten out your arms downwards.  After that, continue the motion by bending your upper body forward.

6. Ankles
In a seated position, put your feet together lightly and pull your toes towards yourself, and then release.

Something magical happens when a child visits with an elder.  I can see it in my parents’ eyes when one of the great-grandchildren walks through their door. My daddy can be bone-tired, but always finds the strength to go to a soccer game or football game if one of the great-grand’s will be gracing the field. Momma has an “open-pantry policy” for the 8 great-grands, who take full advantage of the treats she keeps just for them. Screen doors nearly bang off the hinges, something I would have been chastised for as a child, but not a contrary word can be heard during their visits. After all, grands are grand and great-grands are even grander!

I also witnessed this magic when my children were growing up. We homeschooled and tried to find ways to contribute to our small community. For a few years, we delivered meals to the elderly for the local senior center. My youngest son was around 8-years-old when twice a month, we’d load up hot meals in the trunk and deliver them across town to senior apartments and trailer homes.

The first few times we delivered meals, I’d walk Travis to each door. It wasn’t long until I got the message – these older folks only wanted to see Travis! He’s always been my social butterfly and could talk the paint off of a newly-whitewashed barn. The elderly shut-in’s loved his small talk and yes, we took way too long delivering those meals. Occasionally, I’d have to deliver them by myself. I always got the same greeting, Where’s the boy?”

My first grandchild was born just before my daddy had to have cancer surgery. Our fears were overwhelming. Daddy is the cornerstone of our family. The only bright light there was during those hard days was Bryce. My daughter would bring him to the hospital, so small he was still swaddled in blankets. His bright blue eyes would just make me melt. It truly was magic to watch the pain and dread disappear from my daddy’s eyes when Tara would lay Bryce on his bed. I know God sent Bryce to give my whole family the hope and joy he brought to our lives in the midst of that sorrow. That was 8 years ago. Daddy survived and Bryce has thrived. The two are still thick as thieves.

Elders have so much to give to children – their wisdom, patience, love and acceptance. The joy that children bring to elders just cannot be matched. I encourage you to bring that joy to your elderly loved ones. You’ll be facilitating life-long memories, for both the elder and the child. And oh, you too will feel the joy of a child and of connecting the generations.

For those who care for someone with dementia, it’s often a daily struggle just to communicate. It can lead to a lot of frustration for everyone involved. Many elders who have dementia just quit trying to interact. They withdraw from the world around them and from those they love. This is devastating for their mental and physical health. The good news is that you can reach your loved one by touching them where they are – in the past.

As a journalist and gerontologist, I’ve been fortunate to interview hundreds of seniors. Many of them suffered from varying degrees of dementia. But luckily for me, the information I needed to know from them was about their past. I found talking to elders about their childhood and young adult years was so easy for them to respond to!

One beautiful older woman named Ruth was especially fun to talk to. Ruth was about to turn 102 and I was writing an article about her life. She had trouble remembering if she had just ate her desert, but when I asked her where she was born, her eyes brightened and the story she told was nothing short of amazing. She described her life in San Francisco, losing her mother, being forced from the house at the age of 12, and so much more. She could describe what the city was like when she lived there. She eloquently told me how she felt when her stepmother told her to get married or just leave.

Many experts have studied the benefits of reminiscing but it doesn’t take an expert to use it to improve your relationship with your loved one. Reminiscing is just talking about the past. For those with dementia, it’s going to a place that is safe, a place where they know the answers and don’t have to be afraid of sharing their feelings.

If you plan on reminiscing with elders, there are a few tips I think will help. First of all, plan your sessions for a time of the day that your elder is most receptive. Morning hours are probably best for most, but not all. Pick a comfortable location free from distractions where they can make eye contact and hear you well. Having a table nearby is also helpful so you and your elder can enjoy a cup of tea or other refreshments. Remember, you’re not only remembering memories, your making new ones, so make it special.

Items that will facilitate reminiscing include photographs, music, old toys, books with lots of pictures, and antique household items. If you’re undecided about what to use, it’s okay to just talk. When you feel your elder is comfortable reminiscing, try tape recording their stories. It’s a great way to pass on their history to other family members and even future generations.

You can find great topics and questions for reminiscing on the Story Corps website. But here are a few I have found are golden!

1. What’s the first home you remember as a child?
2. Tell me about the chores you did as a child.
3. What was your favorite thing about school?
4. Who was your best friend when you were a child?
5. What was your favorite vacation activity?
6. What did you want to be when you grew up?
7. What did your parents teach you that feel made a big difference in your life?
8. Who was your first boyfriend/girlfriend?
9. Where did you meet your spouse and what was your first date like?
10. What was your favorite toy?

Don’t forget to ask them about the places where they grew up. For instance, “What was Naperville, IL like when you were a child? You’ll be surprised how much you’ll learn about your parent and the history of the places where they lived.

I hope this encourages you to make these wonderful connections with your loved ones. We are all more than just who we are today. We are an accumulation of all our accomplishments and experiences. Sharing these will give us a greater understanding of each other and allow your loved ones with dementia to express themselves in a positive way.

Care giving can be a joyful experience that benefits you as well as your loved one. But care giving can also take a toll on both your mental and physical health. So when do you ask for help in your care giving journey? The answer is . . . now!

No matter how organized you are or how much time you have to dedicate your life to care giving, there will be times that you will need help. Life has a way of throwing multiple issues in our path – all at the same time! The time to think about getting help and taking the necessary steps should start at the beginning of your care giving experience.

So, you think you can do it all?

Most care givers are women. We’re programmed to provide for the needs of all our loved ones. The trouble begins when we begin to neglect our own needs. At first we just give up a few hours of sleep or the time we usually spend exercising. Then we stop seeing our friends for social events and activities. Did you know that care givers are at risk for depression and physical illness at an alarming rate? How well are you going to be able to give good care if you’re depressed or sick?

There are so many benefits to getting help for care giving. Not only will you have some time to take care of your own needs, but your loved one will also benefit. Your loved one does not want to be a burden to you. By getting some help, they will feel less guilt and enjoy their time with you more! Start with your immediate family and close friends. Chances are they’ve been waiting for you to ask them to help. They have unique qualities that will benefit your loved one. We all have our own different strengths and those differences can brighten the day of the one you care for.

Know what you need and when you need it!

Think about your own specific needs in regards to care giving. Perhaps you could really use someone to fix your loved one lunch a few days a week. Or you really need some time to just go grocery shopping once a week. Make a list of family members, your loved ones’ neighbors and friends. Let them know how much you would appreciate their help and how much it would mean to your loved one. Make sure you also have “back-up plans.” If one person can only help twice a month, find someone else who can “fill-in” for the other days.

When your loved ones’ needs are more than you, family and friends can meet –

At some point, you’ll likely need professional help. The great news is that BrightStar can be there when you need it. Their carefully-screened and highly-trained staff members can help your loved one stay in the comfort of their own home and provide them with the care they need. Even if you just need a weekend off or help on a daily basis, they can be counted on. The BrightStar team can help your loved one and provide you with peace of mind because caring is our business.

The last thing you want to do is have to tell your parents it’s time to stop driving. We all cherish the convenience of getting in the car and going where we want. Driving is freedom. But when is it time to talk to a parent about retiring their car keys?

Warning signs – If one of your parents has stopped driving at night, had near collisions, or an accident, gets lost easily or had a ticket recently, it might be time to have the conversation. There are other signs to watch for and the Hartford group has a great assessment tool for you to use. It’s best to start this conversation before it’s eminently needed so your parent has time to think about it and start to make alternate arrangements for transportation.

How to begin – It’s always best to start with genuine concern. Be careful not to attack the person or their abilities. Has your parent started a new medication or suffered a recent health set-back. This can be the start of the “stop driving” talk. You can start with, “I’m worried about you driving now that you’re taking that medication.” Or, “I’ve noticed you don’t drive any longer at night. Maybe we should make arrangements for your errands and doctor’s appointments.” Don’t expect to be well received the first time you have the talk. Don’t let their displeasure stop you from bringing it up, either. It’s not a pleasant topic but it’s far better than having your loved one get into a serious accident. You may suggest they talk to their doctor for guidance.

Recruit an ally – Sometimes sensitive discussions are best held between spouses. Studies show that men respond more positively to their wives than their children. Get mom on board with this discussion. Let her know you will do your best to make it an easy transition. Getting all your siblings on board will also help. Sharing the responsibility of seeing to your parent’s transportation will make it easier.

Emphasize the positive – Try to look beyond the negative when talking to your parents. Point out how much money they’ll save by giving up the car. Tell them you’ll both enjoy more time together now that you’ll be driving them around. Praise them for making the responsible decision.

Back-up Plans – There will be times when your parents need transportation and you are unable to accommodate them. Have several back up plans. Many communities have dial-a-ride and bus services. For their first trip on the bus or with dial-a-ride, offer to go along. They’ll feel more comfortable if they know what to expect. You may also wish to talk to their neighbors about the situation. Often they’ll be glad to help.

If your parents are in need of any services, be sure to contact Bright Star. Our professionals can make your parents’ lives better because caring is our business.

When it comes to home safety, start from the floor and go up. Everywhere you walk in your home needs to be free from clutter. Stacks of newspapers and magazines can cause you to trip. Electrical cords that must be stepped over are very dangerous. Throw rugs are notorious for causing falls – throw them out. These are simple changes that may save you a trip to the hospital.

Lighting is another huge issue when it comes to home safety. The best investment you can make is in those small night lights for your halls, bathrooms, bedrooms, stairways and closets. You can now purchase night lights that are motion and light sensitive. They will come on when you need it and help prevent falls.

Bathrooms need to be user friendly. Grab bars in the shower and bath tub will help tremendously. Non-skid decals can be purchased very cheaply and placed in your shower or bath tub to help you keep from slipping. And the older you get, the more sensitive your skin is to burns, so turn down your water heater to at least 120 degrees.

You can make your kitchen much safer just by avoiding the need to climb on a step stool. Arrange the items you use often where they are easily accessible. Keep all towels and curtains away from heat sources and make sure your appliance cords are in good shape. Electrical fires are devastating.

If you have stairs inside or on the exterior of your home, make sure they are in good shape with adequate handrails to steady your climb. Adding some solar lights near the bottom of your entry steps can also make it much safer for you.

You can obtain great check lists for home safety from your state’s Department of Aging websites or from AARP. These are great for making sure every inch of your home is as safe as possible.

If you need help with home safety, or any other eldercare issue please take a look at our comprehensive service offering or contact our Geriatric Care Coordinator here at BrightStar Naperville/Oak Brook, who may be able to give you some additional tips and insights, as to how deal with changes in your aging parent(s).

There are many reasons that may make it necessary for you to return to the hospital but many times it can be avoided. If you have heart problems or are recovering from pneumonia, you are at the greatest risk for a return visit to the hospital. If you have either of these health issues, you should have a follow-up appointment within two days of your discharge.

Shorter hospital stays are also a factor in readmissions but another major factor is whether the patient and caregivers understand medication instructions and follow-up care.

The quality of care while you recuperate at home after being hospitalized is critical to your overall health outcome. Take your time to understand your health professionals’ instructions for recuperating before you leave the hospital. Do not leave until you have the instructions in writing and a phone number you can call if you have any questions. Understand fully what medications you are to take and what to avoid while recuperating. If you are the caregiver to an elderly patient, don’t be negligent to ask questions until you fully understand what needs to happen once your loved one goes home.

Elderly patients should not be left alone during their recovery period. New medications and the affects of anesthesia can alter their cognitive abilities. These symptoms are usually temporary but it is crucial they have attentive caregivers after discharge.

Nearly all medications have side effects. Know what they are and how to avoid adverse reactions. Pain medications are often constipating so it is crucial that you stay well hydrated and take stool softeners. If you have been given an antibiotic, know if there are foods you must avoid such as dairy products. If dairy products are not a problem with your antibiotic, it may help to eat yogurt while taking them. This will put good bacteria back into your stomach so you won’t experience diarrhea or cramping often experienced while taking an antibiotic. Be sure to discuss these topics with your health professionals.

If you are unable to have someone stay with you or you’re the caregiver and need help with your loved one, don’t hesitate to call the professionals at Bright Star. Caring is our business.

At times in history, multiple generations lived together, with the adult children caring for/looking after their aging parents.  However, for various reasons, the difficulty in caring for an aging parent is becoming increasingly more difficult to bear.   Middle aged adults in increasing numbers are caring for their adult children who have: moved back after graduating from college, have not been able to find employment, or who’ve been laid off from work.

While boomers can help their aging parents save financially by moving them into their own homes, caring for an older family member who requires home health care, can be stressful.

Do you, or some one you know, find yourself in a situation where you are caring for both older parents and children, at the same time?  If so, do you have some tips/helpful suggestions that you would like to share with our regular readers?

Our compassionate, friendly staff & associates at BrightStar Home-care in Naperville, Illinois, have helped many people in this type of situation.  For more information, take a look at our comprehensive service offering  at BrightStar – Naperville / South DuPage.

Do you, or some one you know, find yourself weighing the options for a loved one?  Take a look at our comprehensive service offering or contact our Geriatric Care Coordinator here at BrightStar – Naperville / Oak Brook, who may be able to give you some additional tips and insights, as to how to best care for an older parent or loved one.